I found this chart interesting

this is where I found it
http://www.thoughtfulhouse.org/tech-labs/disabilities/autism-state-rankings-prevalence.php

this is where they got the data
The Graphing IDEA is a web based graphing tool, which graphs US Special Education disability data, rates, statistics, and administrative prevalence


I found this really strange.  I took a special interest that there are no special ed cases in vermont.


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I get a lot of that's not normal

I have a few friends at work that have autistic nephews.  Isn't it strange that it's more common in boys.  All the kids in critter's social skills class are boys.  I read somewhere that one in 150 children and one in 80 boys are on the autistic spectrum.  I read somewhere else that it may be because girls are naturally better at mimicing behavior than boys.  I can actually see this given the way that girls social circles are usually set up.  I just wondered about that.  I don't know why that is though.  I often think that they must be studying this if not they should.

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Of food and other things

I don't know how it is with others,  but critter goes through a color phase when under stress.  No green food.  Most definitly no food touching.  We solved the touching problem by buying him plastic plates with compartments.

Our other issue is total lack of caring about clothes.  He went to school one day with corderoy jeans on backwards.  They were zipped up over the butt.  One day he went to school,  and we got a call.  It was one of the days we let him dress himself and didn't pay attention to what he was wearing.  He had on a pair of  jeans inside out and backwards and his t shirt was the same.  Not to mention he had his shoes on the wrong feet.  This was last year.  So, he was 11.  At least he's clean.  He bathes often and changes his clothes at least once a day.  Sometimes 5 to 10 times in a day.  

Another thing I see is people complaining that mercury in vacines cause autism.  If you  do your research you would know a tuna sandwich has more mercury in it.   Also,  I think the numbers are probably only slightly higher.  The thing is if you think about it  the autism spectrum has been expanded to cover a broader range of issues.  More children are actually being diagnosed younger.  If you think about it everyone had that socially odd relative who lived at home for years.  The one who didn't fit in.  Had trouble keeping a job,  because he didn't know how to react to some situations.  That's just my opinion.  We've all had that relative, and did anyone ever say maybe he's on the spectrum.  No, there was no such thing as an ASD.  Just a thought.

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so how does Asperger's affect learning? slower, faster, the same as any other 12yr old

I think this is one of the areas it differs in the same as other 12 yr olds.  Except in the special interest stage.  Like in critter's case.  He has forgoten more about the universe and space than I will ever know.  The age of the universe and the expansion rate since the big bang.  The age of the earth.  If it's a special interest area they can talk about it forever.  Critter also knows about a variety of edible plants.  He also has a huge amount of knowledge on insects.  We go through a seasonal phase of interest.  Summer when he can go outside it tends to be insects.  In the winter it's computer and discovery channel.

Most are visual learners.  So,  the thing that works well for most is social situation flip books.  Critter still has one even though he rarely uses it anymore.  Lots of lists, labels, and routine.  There tends to be a lot of ADHD in these kids.  Critter is exceptionaly smart.  He just has the social skills of a much younger child.  Some of these children have fine motor issues too.  We lucked out here,  even though critter can't throw and catch a ball, he can climb like a monkey.

There are a lot of things that the teachers do to help with the ADHD problems in class that don't involve medication.  In grade school a wiggle chair was employed.  It's like a board with a ball on the bottom that can rock in every direction.  He as a safe room in the office where he goes when class gets too frustrating.  His teachers have also employed what they call fidgits.  Things like silly putty and small objects to fidget with in class that keep him in his seat.  Since he was diagnosed and the teachers have become aware of his issues his grades have improved.  The middle school has proved to be even better than grade school.  We have had fewer problems and he gets all A's and B's.

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I know it's wrong

I'm happy today is my day off.  I know that sounds normal,  but it's visitation day.  I get a quiet non meltdown free household until tomarrow.  I think the most important thing if you can swing it is alone time.  If you don't have some escape from the pressure.   I find that a family member that can handle your child overnight is good.  Critter has another friend from school who has asperger's too.  He is more symptomatic than critter, and sometimes he spends the night there.  Sometimes I put him on the computer with a game and go in my bedroom and read.  Sometimes you get an hour or so.  

Critter is a snuggler.  He likes to be held tight.  He also wraps himself tight in blankets when he sleeps.  I know this is normal, but it's 90 degrees in there.  It makes me want to sit in the fridge.  Being the way he is I don't get a lot of alone time.  Sometimes when he gets his wandering the house issue.  We go to bed anyway.  We know he'll be in to check on us in an hour.  He does this about 5 am on a normal day.  The bedroom door will open a crack and I'll hear a little voice say "mom".  I say what and he says ok just checking did you check on me.  We check on him at 3.  We have to go in the room.  Because when he comes in at 5 he always asks.

Well, it's my day off so I'm going to do something.

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I remember

I don't know how everyone else felt about the first time they heard their child really laugh.  I felt like crying I was so happy.  All kids laugh.  The thing is that critter's laughs always sounded a little fake.  Like you laugh at a joke your boss tells that's not funny.

I was watching tv in the living room and he was watching youtube videos on the computer in their room.  He was watching people falling down.  Yes, I know probably inappropriate.  I heard a sound I had never heard before.  My boyfriend asked, "is that critter."  I got up and went to see.  He was laughing so hard tears were streaming down his face.  He looked at me and says, "Mommy this is so funny."  He was 10 yrs old.  That was the point when I realized that was the first time I'd ever heard a true laugh from him since he was a baby.

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I'm at a loss for where to begin

My son is 12 yrs old and was diagnosed a few years ago.  I cried after we got the diagnosis.  I didn't know where to begin.  I know this sounds familiar.  I wondered if it was my fault.  I blamed myself for a long time,  and then I decided it was time to suck it up.  I've spent the rest of my time trying to be a good mommy.  Along the way I realized I'm not really good at it.  My boyfriend more than makes up for my lack in that dept.  


I think I noticed he was different fairly young.  I was a stay at home mom with a son who was 3 yrs older than, we call him Critter, critter.   Things just seemed to be easier in some ways and harder in others.  He walked at 10 months old.  He was diagnosed with epilepsy at 4.  We put him on meds for that.  He knew his ABC's and could remember and read words by sight at 3.  Our oldest was able to type his name by the age of 4 on the computer.  By the age of 5 we took him off the meds because he having behavior problems he didn't have before we put him on them.  The doctor agreed.


We went through years of school telling people he was "just critter."  When we moved and he got into a different grade school.  And I thank god every day we changed schools.  The principal was at a parent teacher conference and told us to have him tested for asperger's.  If it wasn't for Mr.  Kelley we would probably have a lot more problems than we do now.


I find now that we know and can put a name to what's wrong with him.  Even more than ever I want to try to learn more.  Though that has been really harder than you would think.  There is so much information out there, but I've found that it is either hard for me to understand or really doesn't apply to our situation.  We are now trying to muddle through on our own.  I want to educate myself and others.  


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My Son is a Beautiful Child

I needed to have a place to talk about what I've learned about how my son, and some of the things that I've learned over the time since his diagnosis.

If you have questions feel free to post them in the comments.


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